"Erotism, it may be said, is
assenting to life up to the point of death... If a precise definition
were called for, the starting-point would certainly have to be sexual
reproductive activity, of which erotism is a special form. Sexual
reproductive activity is but only humans appear to have turned their
sexual activity into erotic activity. Eroticism, unlike simple sexual
activity, is a psychological quest independent of the natural goal."
-Georges Bataille, Erotism: Death and Sensuality (1986.)
The working title of this chapter was originally “Practical Tantra,”
however I received such a harsh reaction from scholars when editing the
first draft that I realized I needed a title that expressed my
intentions more clearly. Though I am aware of much of the history of
Tantra, this essay is meant to be more exploratory, strictly practical,
strictly to the point, down and dirty. I’m concerned with basic
principles, not entering into a heavily footnoted arguments about the
finer points of the spread and conflicts of Hindu and Buddhist Tantra.
Also, Tantra deals with a great deal more than just sex, but in this
chapter sex is the topic—the spiritual, energetic, and psychological
dimension of sexuality right here, right now. Joseph Matheny suggested
the title “Hillbilly Tantra,”
to get this across, and so it stuck.
Also as this is an inquiry, I am in the business of asking questions
rather than finding solid answers to them. I recognize that this
doesn’t fit into the thesis and exposition format of a standard essay,
however as an author I don’t care. The reason is very simple: this
standard format creates misleading if not entirely erroneous
conclusions from presuppositions which we suppose to be fact.
I haven’t the time in this investigation to discuss these fallacious
myths both of method and authority, but I thought it was only fair to
warn you up front that my goal as a writer is to get you thinking in
ways you may not have before, to get you questioning your ideas and
beliefs, to hold them up to new lights, or arrange them in new
configurations. I am not about to sell you some
truth or answer because truth be told I don’t have it.
So let’s get right down to it: what’s the difference between good and
bad sex?
This question drives the glut of crap literature and ‘zines that line
our shopping centers. Of course, in typical materialistic style, they
presuppose that there is some “move” or even “device” which will pave
the passage between boredom, alienation,
humiliation, and even ecstasy.
Aside from the fact that it’s easier to sell a “device” or teach a list
of 5 secret moves that will drive her wild, these people aren’t asking
this seemingly inane question—what’s the difference between good and
bad sex? What function does it serve in our lives, can it serve in our
lives, and what do our views on the subject say about us as people? Why
do all the cultures of the world explicitly lay down rules – all of
which contradict each other – on right and wrong sexual conduct? When
procreation is taken out of the picture, why is it still such a
fundamental, defining quality of a human being?
Perhaps it is a hackneyed idea that sex is at the root of our beings.
Any idea which can be traced to Freud is out of vogue these days.
However, if you enforce celibacy for a couple months, you might rethink
your stance on this. My experience has been that sexuality does not
control our psyche from the top down, but it seems to prefigure it from
the bottom up. It’s a raw source of energy which drives us out of bed
each morning. Aside from being the means by which we reproduce, it is
the subversion of this urge which drives us to civilization - and its
discontents. If you can control and cultivate your sexual energy, then
you are capable of nearly anything. If blocked, like a stream it cuts
another channel, or dams up, becoming stagnant or ultimately breaking
the levies that hold it, often in disastrous ways. Chinese and
ayurvedic medicine both recognize this; harnessing and directing sexual
energy is considered paramount to general wellbeing.
There is a well-known link between sex and death in the mythologies of
the world; the libidinal drive which drives us to participate in the
world is also driving us towards our deaths. From this perspective,
life and death are two sides of the same coin,
much as man and woman are.
And here, plain as day, is the first key to sex magick. The
archetypical male and female energies which power and inform the
universe can be brought together through a union of a particular male
and female energy. This in no way precludes homosexuality, however at
any given moment you will notice that some participants embody the
active “yang” principle while others
are participating as passive “yin.”).
The Buddhist idea of Maya is relevant here as well. By definition, Maya
is “the transitory, manifold appearance of the sensible world, which
obscures the undifferentiated spiritual reality from which it
originates; the illusory appearance of the sensible world.” (American
Heritage Dictionary of the English Language, 2000.) It is the breaking
of the one into the many, in the world of opposites.
It is also said that woman is the passage into Maya, not because of a
sublimated hatred of the feminine, but rather through the simple
recognition that it is through woman which we enter the world. This is
seen as a symbol of the underlying sexual dynamism which allows the
world, as we know it, to continue. In other words, sex is the
prefiguring source of duality and dynamism.
One of the Buddha’s teachings was that through desire and fear, our
personal energy is tied or yoked to the world energy in such a way that
we cannot extricate ourselves. Unless we become aware of its nature as
illusion. Again we have a pair of opposites, desire being the
motivation towards, and fear being the motivation away from.
It is as if we are all spiders, trapped within the webs we ourselves
have woven. Our very personalities and inclinations themselves are a
part of this binding web. In one of Joseph Campbell’s lectures on
Buddhism, he relates one of their central teachings by saying "…the
lust of all the senses is a fire. Quench that fire." (Campbell, 1997.)
Merely quenching the fire of the senses would be thanatos, the impulse
for destruction, decay, and death. (Thus Nietzsche’s assessment of
Buddhism and Christianity as agents of “pessimism.” (Nietzsche, )
According to common knowledge, this was postulated by Sigmund Freud as
coexisting with and opposing the life instinct. However the idea far
precedes him, through the dour German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer,
and into the common-sense of Pagan and Aboriginal traditions across the
globe. The practice of sex magick, as I think of it, reverses this—the
trick is not to quench the fire, but instead to master it.
Use the sexual impulse, don’t let it use you.
Stealing fire from the gods is one of the basic principles of practice.
You work on fanning those flames it, all the time if possible, without
being particularly attached to them. Eventually, through this approach,
one strives to replace desire and fear with blissful knowledge of the
immediate, eternal present.
This “fire” is the underlying fabric of reality. Electromagnetic poles
drive our X-boxes, our microwaves. The mechanism which allows for
consciousness is electrochemical. Through extension, is there an
electromagnetic aspect to the sexual act, as well?
“E=mv2/2 contains the factor m (mass) and v (velocity), and these would
appear to be incommensurable with the nature of the empirical psyche.
If psychology nevertheless insists on employing its own concept of
energy for the purpose of expressing the activity of the psyche, it is
not of course being used a mathematical formula, but only as its
analogy. But note: the analogy is itself an older intuitive idea from
which the concept of physical energy originally developed. The latter
rests on earlier application of an activity not mathematically defined,
which can be traced back to the primitive or archaic idea of the
“extraordinarily potent.” This mana concept is not confined to
Melanesia, but can also be found in Indonesia and on the east coast of
Africa; and it still echoes in the Latin numen, and more faintly, in
genius. The use of the term libido in the newer medical psychology has
surprising affinities with the primitive mana. This archetypal idea is
therefore far from being only primitive, but differs from the
physicist’s conception of energy by the fact that it is essentially
qualitative rather than quantitative.” (Jung, 1969.)
Let’s return to our initial question. Imagine two sexual encounters, on
the surface identical in every way. You went through every possible
posture permutation in the karma sutra. All the paint on the walls is
now clumped under your fingernails.
Your neighbors hate you passionately.
However in the first encounter, both people’s energies are depleted as
a result. They feel a little guilty, like a dog that keeps getting
scratched in that one spot and can’t keep it’s leg from twitching no
matter how it might try. Now the alcohol has worn off and you need to
slink into a hole somewhere and listen to The Smiths until your mascara
has run so badly you look
like you just did nine rounds with Muhammad Ali.
In the other case, you feel energized, more in synch with yourself and
those around you. You have a feeling like there are aspects of your
personality just outside your reach that were, if not unlocked, at
least hinted at or unearthed. What is the distinction?
The answer is of course, to a certain extent, specific to the context
of the interaction. The “context” to a large extent is merely the
environment, the factors that play into creating a mood and state of
mind that we find pleasurable. However “context” also includes elements
like ideas, emotions, our past histories, and all of the minutiae that
make up the subtext of our everyday reactions.
There is an organic dimension as well. Though the Kama Sutra puts a
great deal of attention into the more physical side of this, a more
crucial, and subtle key to match or mismatch is energetic. In common
speech we usually refer to this as “chemistry.” A dissatisfying
experience results when there is no transition of energy on both sides;
when these flood gates do open, there is an active interplay in both
directions like the Taoist yin-yang symbol which leaves each
participant forever changed, touched in part by the divine presence of
the Other, whether the event was the beginning of a long relationship
or a so-called one-night-stand. The distinction between good and bad
sex is nevertheless subjective, and in no way moralistic.
Why do you do what you do and is it what you want, really? It may seem
fantastical, but the simple intent to be there with the Other, respect
them, and recognize them for what they are, begins opening up these
channels of energetic communication.
We also have expectations of what is or is not satisfying. To one
person it might be so simple as “the harder the better,” in which case
if they are paired with someone who has a very different expectation,
the encounter will result in almost certain disaster. These
expectations are consciously controllable however, a great deal more
than the context often is, and this is one of your fulcrums for
actually making the encounter mutually enjoyable. Thus “intent” may be
a more accurate word to use.
They say the way to Hell is paved with good intent. Who knows, maybe it
is. But the first difference between these two hypothetical situations,
one “bad,” one “good,” comes simply from these intentions going into
it.
(The same thing can be said for drugs when used for visionary
purposes.)
Yet you can intend something and not have it come through to action,
much less the results you want. We see examples of this every day.
Intent is fundamental to action, and colors it in a subtle but
pervasive way that most of us can feel, even if we can’t put our finger
on it. The intents that matter are embodied in action.
The difference between relative success and failure, once you’ve set
your sights, are the things that “block it” from manifesting. I know I
used it as an example but we’re really not just talking about sex,
we’re talking
about the alignment of your psyche, and your body.
It may seem peculiar to you that the blocks within your spine, or the
flexibility of your tendons has anything to do with your intention of
manifesting enough money to get from California to New York, or of
really enjoying physical contact with your partner, but it is all
linked, at least metaphorically. And the practices you use to “let go”
of your muscular blocks are just as effective when applied to emotional
blocks. In fact, the energetic and muscular blocks within your body
need to be dissolved; they are manifestations of corresponding
psychological blocks. It works both ways, who can say which came first.
If nothing is holding you up, you’re light as a feather.
There’s an easy litmus test for this, which I find I have to return to
quite frequently. If you think you have something to hold on to,
remember that everything you own, and everyone you know, will be pulled
away, torn apart into their base parts by the tidal wave of time. Like
the Pink Floyd song, everything you say, do, create, or destroy, will
be pulled out into the deep, dark sea. Does this thought make you
depressed? If so, you’re holding on.
If the “climate” is ripe for your intents to manifest, it will do so
without any conscious activity or effort whatsoever. If it isn’t, any
amount of effort still won’t make the grade.
Make the “climate,” the situation or context, ripe for harvest.
You can start inside yourself, with the aspects you have direct control
over.
One shift that often yields desired results is to change emphasis from
doing to being. In the realm of business this shift can often result in
disaster, but when it comes to love, the opposite is true.
Another is to recognize that, in truth, we oftentimes have little
control over the contexts or environments we are connected to. If your
environment isn’t congruent with your best interests, it is more likely
that you will be miserable, rather than change all of those variables.
If there are changes you can make to bring yourself in accord with that
context, that is one possible solution. Another is to find a situation
that is more congruent with who you are. Know thyself.
The variety of contexts life can give you vary so much that guidelines
have to be similarly fluid. This, by the way, may be why we call it
“magick.” The science and art of causing change in conformity with
Will. Like the Olympic gymnast performing incredibly complicated
actions seemingly effortlessly, to us the results may appear
supernatural. However there is a method to it. The principles involved
are consistent, and thus can be observed, tested, and improved upon.
The involved principles, in the case of sex magick, are primarily
psychological and energetic. Violence and The Sacred
As I said earlier, the sex and death link is transcultural. We also
find a related link between eroticism and violence.
Ritual, eroticism, and violence have been linked through all of human
history. Most Gods or Goddesses of sex are also deities of death or
war. Consider the initiation rites of certain tribes in New Guinea,
where the young males have their first coming-of-age sexual encounter
with a sacrificial virgin. When the last male is there with her, in
full embrace, the two are crushed to death by tons of logs, immediately
pulled from the rubble and eaten. This is obviously a rather extreme
version of what we see in the Catholic communion service. However, as
deplorable as we may find it, it is hard to deny that this ritual
retains its overwhelming significance, whereas the Catholic mass, to
many, is just a series of empty words, some weak wine, and stale
wafers.
Aggression often finds its outlet in sex or the representation of
violence. Esoteric connections between sex and death aside, you can
easily trace this directly back to power structures within the social
games we invent.
This ‘game’ is also a product of our new conception of sex as
commodity:
“…This powerful new type of myth has assumed an unexpected form:
advertising and consumerism, forms of proselytizing far more pervasive
in our society than Christian doctrine was during the Middle Ages. And,
like all the mythologies of past ages, it provides a framework which
determines many of the rules and fashions governing human sexual
behavior… This commercialization of desire both tries to satisfy an
insatiable demand and is extremely profitable. The process is circular.
The romantic tradition is already established in these forms serve to
satisfy an existing appetite. At the same time the perpetual depicting
of romance stimulates the appetite for more.” (Jamake Highwater, 1991.)
This a key point. We will deal with the topic of mythology and
sexuality in consumer culture in many different guises as we progress.
It should be obvious to any student of psychology that the worst way to
remove a block is to overcharge it, to “attack it.” Like in any other
yogic practice, stretching is a process of relaxing.
One should never experience pain from forcing. These shields are up for
a reason, so just turning them off and opening up to whatever comes
your way without conscious awareness and respect for your own “edges”
or boundaries and those of your partner(s) is dangerous and unhealthy.
The key to removing blocks is dissolving them…focusing attention on
them, actually asking them to present their concerns to you, and
letting them simply drain away. In practice this sometimes means
actually re-creating the cause of the block in a controlled way. There
is no hard and fast rule for what key will fit your lock.
There is an analogy here that I’d like to pull from my experience of
internal martial arts. There is an exercise commonly practiced in forms
such as Tai Chi, Bagua, and Xingyi, called “push hands.” Two or more
partners take on a relaxed, balanced posture, make physical contact in
any number of ways, and begin flowing back and forth, focusing their
attention a number of variables, such as the rocking of ones weight,
the integration of all the tendons, ligaments and bones in ones body,
the energetic give and take between you and your partner(s), and
ultimately, the same factors in the other persons body. A well trained
individual can sense the distribution of weight, and skeletal,
muscular, and energetic blocks in a persons body just through a light
touch.
Though this is generally practiced using little physical force, at
least during the first couple years of practice, it teaches many
valuable lessons, martial and otherwise. If while moving one of your
muscles or joints locks up, that “break” could be utilized by your
partner to knock you off. One of the first lessons is learning to
“dissolve” these breaks, and integrate the
various systems of the body into harmony.
For the most part actually yielding to someone’s force, while guiding
it into particular channels, keeps you in a position of control. If you
match force with force, you’ve often lost. When muscles contract, they
also lock. Blood and chi don’t flow well through contracted muscles,
and that is something a trained opponent can easily use against you. If
an opponent advances forcefully, yielding by rolling to the side keeps
you in a tactically superior position; they wind up overcommitted,
and you wind up facing their undefended side.
The same is true in all energetic dynamics—sexual, social, or
otherwise. Hopefully in most cases an adversarial mentality isn’t
necessary, but the philosophy of awareness, yielding, and thus avoiding
conflicts
while retaining the upper hand may prove very useful to you.
Let’s move back to sex magick and Tantra. Much of the literature on
these topics focuses on the importance of de-sexualizing sex, so as to
unravel the cultural obsession. There’s great value in this, but the
practices provided don’t generally strike at the personal,
psychological nature of sexual obsession. They also tend to be boring,
which is the last thing sex should ever be. It is true that a certain
kind of patience is required that you might not normally exercise in
the bedroom, living room floor, or elevator, however you don’t have to
do deep breathing exercises for twelve hours on a bed of roses to
practice sex magick. Do it on a pile of cactus with a herd of cattle if
you like. The distinction is in your energy, in your intent, and in
your attitude. Note however -- and this cannot be under stressed -- if
you aren’t intending the growth and enjoyment of those you’re
participating with, then you’re pissing in your drinking water, since
you’re going to be alchemically mixing your energies with theirs.
Even if altruism isn’t your game, that’s just bad business.
The key factors here are two-fold: dissolving blocks, as we just
mentioned, and developing heightened focus.
The latter is actually fairly straight forward. The activity of
visualizing symbols, associating an intent with it, and “firing” during
sexual activity clearly develops your focus, just as bicycling and
juggling at the same time would. In a nutshell, the practice of
sigilization allows us to focus an intent and link it physiologically
to the “anchor” of the zero-state of orgasm.
This idea of “dissolving” is the real trick. Sex can be one of the most
effective ways to start dissolving your psychological and physical
blocks. Looking at what we hold on to, what turns us on, what turns us
off, and turning these into psychological benefits or boons rather than
crutches or vices is the name of the game. This doesn’t necessarily
mean that we should all start fucking like rabbits and call ourselves
Magickians. Though “they” can be a fun lot nevertheless!
At the same time, taboos and psychological blocks don’t exist without a
reason. They are counterbalances for hidden or repressed energies,
which Carl Jung referred to as the Shadow. These must be integrated for
an individual to become whole, and this integration, clearly, is one of
the principle functions of magick, mythology, and religion, (as
previously defined.) This makes sex magick, and role-playing within
that context, both very powerful and potentially very dangerous. When
these fantasies are pursued as knee-jerk responses, without any
recognition of the underlying cause,
you can easily drive yourself from neurosis to full-blown psychosis.
Nymphomania is as much a psychic “counterbalance” as prudishness or
frigidity. Something in the subconscious is “weighted” so heavily in
one direction that your actions on the conscious side are extreme, in
an effort to bring stability. Similarly nymphomaniacs, by definition,
don’t get much pleasure from the actual act of sex. This is because
they’re blocked off from the energetic interaction which they so
desperately crave. When it comes down to the question of “how much is
too much?” really only we can determine that. The best gauge for that
is simply: am I happy?
Because sex is naturally such an intense experience, we oftentimes
develop methods of “shielding” ourselves from the potential brilliance
of that moment by rushing. Suddenly sex becomes a horrifying relay
race. If you do find yourself hitting one of these 'edges,' it can be
easy to recognize it for what it is. I’m not talking about an
occasional quickie here. What I’m talking about is the sadly high
percentage of women age 21 and below that have yet to have an orgasm
despite the fact that they have a drunken encounter at least three
times a week. Take your time!
Any fetish or fantasy can be easily psychoanalyzed, and explored with
great benefit once it has been understood for what it is. For instance,
a fantasy involving being bound, or dead, is on the surface focused
around giving absolute power to the Other. More crucially, in these
cases it revolves around making your self an Other to your self; the
arousal is often voyeuristic regarding what is being done to yourself
as an Other. This is commonly a psychological counterbalance for a time
in the past when the individual actually had no control. We then often
attempt to play act the scenario in a way which gives us control
through transference, even if we must put ourselves in a situation
externally resembling the event which created the imprint. Of course a
physical rape is hardly necessary for the formation of such a fantasy.
Another person might have a similar inclination, but it is the result
of wanting to be forced to do things that they actually want to do, but
can’t allow themselves to. In other words those unspeakable desires
are transferred onto another who forces the conscious mind to
capitulate.
Such things are very specific and contextual, as these examples
demonstrate.
It All Began In Middle School
Any exploration of your sexuality will likely lead you to question, and
conflict, with the taboos of the society you live within. It is
undeniable that these taboos effect your beliefs, and behavior. Your
ideas of identity, and of how you fit into the culture around you, are
written out of these beliefs.
Some guidelines on this subject can save you a lot of trouble.
It is patently untrue that there is some underlying “human morality,”
wherein, for instance, murder has never been sanctioned by the
predominant mythology. Even a cursory study of anthropology will
demonstrate this. Pharaohs were expected to have sex with their
sisters. Rape, murder, even in rare instances patricide, are all
acceptable in certain cultures, under certain contexts. As a matter of
fact murder is sanctioned by our own cultural mythology - so long as it
is done under the banner of War.
Every culture also has taboos, and many individuals inside that
culture, when they first come to awareness outside the confines of
their culture, do so through intentional transgressions which are done
with this exterior, so-called “Left handed,” quest in mind. However
there is no inherent virtue in this path either, bounded as it is by
the same laws of acceptance and transgression. Taboos are requisite for
cultures to maintain their integrity. The content of the taboo,
however, is completely arbitrary in any universal sense.
Christian society has developed quite a complicated and subversive
gauntlet of taboos regarding sexuality. Not that sexual taboo is
distinctly Christian, however the particular set of taboos we generally
deal with in American society are distinctly Christian. Ideas of
morality and sex are so tangled together that it may be difficult for
us to even tell which inclinations are natural and which come about as
a reaction of one kind or another to absurd tribal superstitions
surrounding reproduction. I assume, if you’re reading this book, that
you probably don’t consider yourself a modern Christian.
But how many of us make some of our decisions as a reaction to the
Christian moral yardstick?
It is no secret that possession, jealousy, control and dominance all
seem to spring from the same source. These social games develop as we
move from childhood and psychic dependence to individuality.
This period probably began for you in Middle School. Ideas about how
you fit in with others begin here; for many of you, they end here as
well. I have always considered myself a maverick. I’ve always done
things “my way,” even to the detriment of my social well being. In
Middle school, kids vying for the “top dog” position would beat the
living hell out of others who didn’t wear the “right” brand of
sneakers, who didn’t parrot the “right” phrases. My reaction was to
fade into the woodwork, read, write, and draw. I played the game by
actively not playing the game. Here I am almost two decades later, yet
in a sense how much has really changed?
The “game” is decidedly different between the genders, but within
the male governed system the outcome is generally political and
hierarchical. “Who’s on top?”
In our cases, being the product of a culture that is obviously highly
sexually repressed and aggravated, (pick up a copy of any popular
magazine some time), aggression is subverted alongside the sexual urge.
When the sexual block is released, so too may be the aggressive block.
Jamake Highwater discusses this connection in the final chapter of his
book Myth and Sexuality (1991),
The mythology of masculinity… is built upon a mentality which is an
implicit aspect of the disillusionment of America’s consumer society at
the close of the twentieth century. In the competitive decades since
the Industrial Revolution, when the human body became a machine, many
men have been transformed into lethal weapons by unrealized
expectation. For them sex is no longer erotic. It has become a
pornography, a sexual commodity, a mechanism that, failing the
obtainment of quick pleasure, takes out its frustration and rage by
producing humiliation.
Finding what really works for you takes quite some trial and error, as
well as flexibility. (Possibly literally). It will most definitely
require complete honesty on your part with yourself and those you love,
as you should expect no less from them.
The only rule is that there are no rules. The norms you have been
handed by your culture, whatever it is, may not in any way apply to
your own temperament. This is true across the board, not just in terms
of sexuality, even though sexuality is the root of ones psychological,
physical, and ultimately spiritual being. A taint there will show all
the way through.
Many consider this so-called witches-brew another part of human nature
and accept the tribal beliefs handed to them without question or
investigation. Questioning everything - at least everything that
doesn’t sit right with me - has always been a part of my nature. All I
can really do is espouse the “if you’re falling, jump” attitude. While
this opinion may or may not have resonance with your experience, it
stands to reason that if you are determined to figure out just what you
are made of,
sex and sexuality are the place to begin.
Coming to know who you are is really the only knowledge you can ever
hope to have. At least early in this experimentation, it is difficult
if not impossible to step away from your situational programming
without temporarily breaking taboos. Gradual change is more likely to
give you healthy, organic and lasting results, as forcing anything
psychologically or physically is subject to the law of compensation.
You can’t really know where you stand until you step out of yourself
and let go of everything you believe in.
Let me emphasize, however, the distinction between acting out and
letting go of preconceptions. This takes maturity and courage. Social
boundaries must be removed to reveal what the natural boundaries really
are. All beliefs must be questioned through tumultuous action. Who you
were when you chose a belief may not be who you are now. When you are
satisfied in your knowledge, complacent with your status, you cannot
learn. To live and learn we must always - first and foremost - remember
to change with the changes. What worked yesterday may not serve quite
so well for you tomorrow.
Freedom may be attained through the destruction and replacement of
those taboos or societally created psychosexual programs: freedom to
have an active choice in who you are, how you process information, and
what you want from the experience of being alive. There are no rules,
only guiding principles.
Knowing that you have the freedom and the right to experience pleasure,
in whatsoever way you choose -- so long as you are not hindering anyone
else’s right to the same through doing it -- is certainly one of the
first steps in recognizing “there is no God but man,” as well as “Love
is the law; love under Will.” Both of these are Thelemic buzz-phrases
which I think actually have the greatest impact when taken out of
context.
Short of proposing some kind of enforced free-love utopia, which seems
to me almost as nightmarish as our present condition of cultural sexual
psychosis, we can at least expect to become more complete individuals
from learning what sex is and means to us entirely apart from the
“benefit” of cultural-religious ideology or categories be they hetero-,
homo-, bi-, or even poly-. These categories, like genres of music, may
begin as the new herald of some revolution, but before too long it’s
$19.95 on the shelf at Hot Topic. Once something has been pinned down
to such a degree, it can be sold. Some tout piercing and tattooing as a
rebirth of tribal initiation ceremonies, yet at the same time insecure
teenie-boppers are biting their lips over their first belly-button
piercing. As un-PC as this may be, “gay pride” parades and the like do
more harm than good in a way by creating an even broader gap of
definition. Though they may unite those who already feel and believe
the same by having a flag or cultural identity to rally under, they
actually create a greater partisan atmosphere, and may alienate those
who are sitting on the fence.
The key point is not that we are gay, or black, or straight, or
homosexual, but that we’re all human. Granted there are times when
people are discriminated against for 'being what they are', but then,
when turning the other cheek doesn’t work and it is all out warfare, a
nice dose of fox lure in someone’s car ventilation system will do fine.
It’s hopeless trying to change the mind of someone who hates you for
who you are, since their hatred is generally pointed at an estranged
part of their own psyche. If you can’t beat ‘em, taunt ‘em mercilessly.
There’s no point arguing. The root of any belief is emotional, not
intellectual. Logic, if it is applied to a belief at all, is just
applied after the fact to rationalize what someone already believes. If
you don’t believe me, try to use logic to convince a Baptist to accept
Osiris as a “mythic symbol”
with as much validity as Jesus.
Personally I see no point in defining myself with a trend, or going the
other way and holding back on what I want to do because it might put me
in the same “category” as the vast majority who are missing the boat by
my estimation. Maybe I’m missing the boat too, or maybe I’m trying to
sell you something. Think for yourself.
I AM AMERIKKKA'S FAVORITE SOFT DRINK.
The power of sexual energy isn’t overlooked within our modern Ad cult.
This basic principle or "lever" rules the cover of Maxim. For most, the
very concept of sex, a thing which can be shaped and molded through
societal reinforcement and taboo, causes a physiological reflex which
can be used to excite you about things that you wouldn't otherwise be
excited. This "lever" may even operate on a level that you are not at
all conscious of. This "sexual power" can be "magickally" transferred
through association.
For instance, if you see a beautiful woman covered in sweat, moaning
orgasmically and drinking a Coke, then for many the psychological
transference is immediate. No advertiser in their right mind thinks
that you will consciously believe you will get hot women if you drink
coke, but all of them bank on your immediate, visceral response. This
branded identity that they are trying to build for you is a Myth every
bit as much as the Ramayana or Bhagavad-Gita.
The sociological and anthropological premises which apply to Myth,
which we explored in Living The Myth, all apply. Throughout our lives
many of us have had an ego-serving program of desire and fear ingrained
in us through our sexuality. This occurs throughout childhood and
adolescence. For some it ends here, with the first imprint, remaining
the same throughout the rest of adulthood. Others choose to consciously
expand their ingrained inclinations, or imprint others.
The rules of the 'in group' and 'out group' are one of the many
principles by which we all collectively brainwash each other into
whatever cultural taboos and trends we want to associate with the
mythic crisis points of sexual maturation, sexual relations, and
pregnancy. We are valued or shamed based on how we fit into the cultic
sexual environment we grow up in, and develop various complexes as a
result. The way that we answer these questions for ourselves ultimately
creates the myth for our own children.
One predominant myth that still remains an undertone within American
culture is that sex is both sacrosanct and dirty, profane and yet
representative of the highest saccharine ideals, sold as a commodity
and beyond value. This oxymoronic sexual code results in an incredibly
polarized moral and social standard that in many ways ultimately
supports deceit, snickers bars, and animal husbandry. A man's very
dignity rests on his ability to ensnare young damsels and yet
simultaneously remain virtuous to an ideal, and the women mercilessly
peck at each other and preen themselves vying to be the most valuable
prize.
In this dramatization, monogamy is a contract not of trust but of
control, and the power games of deceit become the top priority in a
relationship. (No animals were harmed in the writing of this sentence.)
It may seem that this practice is easier than the ascetic, monastic
approach, however this is not so. It is hard to plunge into the
uncharted wilderness without any categories.
The monastic life is designed to aid you in this quest by stilling or
quelling most of the aspects of life that can be so disquieting. To
do this successfully, and live within the world, you must find
stillness in motion. This energy -- formerly directed towards fruitless
ego-related clutching -- turns outwards and bears witness rather than
seeking to possess. This is what helps bring your energy into harmony
with your environment: not "holding in," that is not allowing yourself
to breathe out, or "holding out" and not allowing yourself to breathe
in.
Living without identity crutches like what kind of clothes you wear,
what kind of music you like to listen to, or how you like to get off is
hard. Being able to relax is an acquired skill. It’s not something that
you "get," and then it's over with. I have found this place many times
in my life, and have been lured back into the whirlwind by one
attachment or another.
You must extricate yourselves from the societally learned concepts of
what is 'sexy' by taking a look at what immediately pleases you, of
where you could have gotten this idea, and if you like or don't like
the effects this desire has had on your lives. If it is something that
you don't entirely like, what I would recommend is not to change it,
but merely to explore what ways you could explore this in a way that
you enjoy more, which ultimately is more healthy for you and your
partner(s). This is a very personal process, and one which is prone to
make you take harsh looks at other people long before you can suffer
those same glances inward. What I am talking about here is honestly
assessing what it is that you desire, what that says about you as a
whole, and, should you desire, where you got these ideas. No matter the
decisions you come to,
this exploration always bears fruit.
Practice
Following this are some general guidelines for beginning your
exploration. Your mileage will likely vary.
Alchemical
The first method is creative. It is practiced through partner
coupling, traditionally male and female, though again in this practice
gender refers to role, rather than biology. The male serves as an
emissary from the eternal as that archetypical principle, the woman is
the same. In some practices this is changed somewhat, where the woman
appears as the goddess, and the male serves as he is-- singular and
mortal. This practice aims at bringing about the experience of 'eternal
love': the man being One as all men, the female One as all women, and
through the union of these eternal principles results One: the
unfolding of that universal will unto itself, self-fulfilling and
fulfilled. Almost all of the unveiling of Nuit in Crowley's The Book of
the Law can be seen as a poetic expression of this.
In a more practical sense, singular orgasm is not the goal. The
experience is somewhat like riding waves, one picks you up and carries
you along, but before it comes crashing down you back off, and paddle
on over to another. Many schools of Taoist alchemy are insistent that
male ejaculation seriously depletes a man's chi and threatens to ruin
the integrity of this process. However many successful tantrika choose
to have orgasms in the 'normal' way without seeming to hinder their
practice.
Let personal trial and error be your guide.
Orgia
The second method is that of the orgy, which brings about the
experience of Nothingness, expressed by Crowley as the Night of Pan:
individuality is blotted out, the ego is blotted out, there is only the
self aware night or naught.
When the walls come tumbling down, distinctions are broken and the
energy body of all participants becomes one. Many who have experimented
with this relate the perception of being one organism with many limbs.
The love of the group, unrestricted by fetters is agape, not eras.
All the same, this has nothing at all in common with a frat-party
fuck-a-thon. The first sign of success in either practice is that
rather quickly a surprisingly small amount of physical stimulation is
required. If you need a simple guide, think opium den.
All this required is that you consciously 'amplify' each experience
that you are having, and continue to patiently expand this threshold
with every breath, and every second. Those of you who have experimented
with MDMA may recognize the feeling as virtually indistinguishable from
“rolling.” This languorousness can really be amplified almost
limitlessly. We have more ability to consciously heighten or deaden our
tactile sense than many of us realize. As chemicals such as MDMA
release neurotransmitters already present in the brain, it comes as no
surprise that you can in fact feel a little “burnt out” immediately the
next day. However this effect is generally a great deal more mild, and
easier to do away with, than the after-effects of hallucinogens. As you
are amplifying this experience, pretty soon you will realize that what
you are playing with is a sensation of energy. These energy fields can
expand, contract, or change in almost any other manner we can conceive
of.
Both of these practices are distinct and bring about very specific
results. The potential for group sexual practice is astronomical: every
person brings with them not just a body but an entire world. A mind
stretched by a new idea never returns to its original dimensions.
However there is also an exponential increase in the chance that
ego-serving desire or fear take over and the moment is lost in
coveting, and delusional fantasies-- which can become quite tangible
and dangerous in conjunction with sex magick. Few people are capable of
love without the 'thief' known as fear. In this setting, supposing
everyone is there fully willingly, there is nothing but the moment.
Anything else is poison.
Regardless of the practice(s) you choose, cultivating agape within your
group or tribe should be a primary concern to all interested in
evolving culturally.
Complete honesty and persistence are the only means of attaining the
balance required to take on these practices. Nothing revolutionary is
every gained without serious risk. If you chose a life of evolution,
you will likely never find rest but you may find freedom.
Sources:
Bataille, Georges. Erotism: Death and
Sensuality. City Lights Publishers. (1986.) American Heritage Dictionary of the
English Language. Houghton Mifflin; 4th edition. (2000.) Campbell, Joseph. Mythos 2.4: The Way
to Illumination. Wellspring Media. (1997.) Jung, Carl Gustav. On the Nature of
the Psyche. Bollingen. (1969.) Highwater, Jamake. Myth And Sexuality.
New American Library Trade. (1991.)
About the Author: When James Curcio (http://www.jamescurcio.net)
isn't conducting mind-control experiments, he is creative director for
a number of media companies and projects. Some of these include "Join
My Cult!" (http://www.joinmycult.org)
a novel released through New Falcon Press in 2004, and it's sequel,
untitled and presently nearing the end of its first draft, and chapters
on Myth and Magick in Generation Hex (Disinformation.) SubQtaneous:
Some Still Despair In A Prozac Nation, a collaborative concept album,
is also nearing completion, with a roster of musicians including Scott
Landes (Babalon, Collide). He is creative director both for "Chasing
The Wish," a graphic novel based on Dave Szulorski's popular Alternate
Reality Game, and Fas Ferox, a multimedia epic with a team of artists
including Christian Cordella (http://www.christiancordella.net)
and creative consultant Neil Gaiman (Sandman, American Gods, Mirror
Mask.) All of his work is informed by a
background in world mythology and the occult, as well as an interest in
psychology, and physical-religious practices such as yoga and
bagua-zhang. Most "139 sightings" occur on the East Coast of the U.S.,
though he is by-and-large an elusive beast.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
