How to create a relationship with
entities, demons, and deities
By Taylor Ellwood
When it comes to how I interact with entities, whether it’s a pop
culture entity, a deity, a demon, or an entity I’ve created, I take an
approach which is rather different from the approaches which either
advocate forcibly evoking an entity and commanding it to do a
particular task (See Bardon 2001, Lisiewski 2004), or advocate the
opposite relationship, where the magician is commanded by the entity
(See Kaldera 2006). While it is evident that both of these extremes
work for some magicians, I prefer to take a middle of the road
approach, a moderate path toward the relationship I create with what I
work with, which is based on a somewhat different perspective of
deities, demons, and entities.
In the former approach I mentioned above, where a person commands an
entity, the relationship is set up on the basis that the entities that
are summoned are untrustworthy and as such needed to be commanded and
compelled (often with the aid of other entities), in order to ensure
that those entities will do the tasks you set them. You have to set up
a lot of protection and if you get even one thing wrong in the spell
work, you will face dire consequences (Bardon 2001, Lisiewski 2004). In
the latter approach, deities and other entities are treated as powerful
beings that can insert themselves into peoples’ lives right down to the
point of possession and at the utmost extreme can treat their
worshippers as slaves (Kaldera 2006). Both of these types of
relationships may provide some advantages to their practitioners, but
there is something to also be said for the disadvantages that can
occur. However, this is not the article for that and it is important to
remember that each and every person makes hir own choices in terms of
how they manifest their spirituality and their relationships with what
they work with. I’ll also note that what I might perceive as an
advantage or disadvantage is based on my subjective perception.
Instead of focusing further on the extremes, since we’re speaking of
choices, spirituality, and relationships, let’s take a look at my
middle path approach. I do evocation and invocation on a fairly regular
basis. Invocation can involve complete possession by the entity, to the
point that I have no recollection of what happened while that entity
possessed me. Even so, the possession is a voluntary choice taken on
for the purpose of serving as an entities mouth piece, or sometimes as
a way of aspecting a specific personality aspect or, if you will, a
different version of myself. However for a possession to occur within
my paradigm, there also needs to be an understanding between myself and
the entities I work with.
Wok with are the key words to focus, because in fact that’s pretty how
I conceive of my relationship with the entities I’m involved. I work
with them in a cooperative partnership, which is based on a perception
that said entities are not greater or less than me, but simply
different. That’s right, I don’t even consider the gods as greater than
me. I consider them, instead to be different than me, but equal despite
the differences. They have some advantages I don’t have when it comes
to what they can do, but I also have my own talents, and it’s fairly
obvious to me that these being wouldn’t be working with me unless they
felt there was something I could offer them that they couldn’t find
elsewhere or within their own capabilities. Likewise, I’m working with
them because they can provide something to me that I couldn’t find
elsewhere. If that’s the case, I say there’s power held on both
sides, and if one side wants the other to work for it, it’s time to
make a bargain.
Does that sound crass, or mercantile, or mercenary? Well perhaps it is.
I’ve been accused of being blasphemous before, because I’ve refused to
take on a certain servile attitude. But I see this recognition that
both sides have something the other wants as a bargaining chip, as a
way of defining a relationship of cooperative partnership, complete
with appropriate boundaries that define how that cooperative
relationship manifests. When you have something that someone else
wants, you barter, you create a contract, and from that you form a
relationship.
Of course, in choosing to work in a cooperative partnership, I’m also
throwing out the opportunity to command entities. The reason is that I
happen to believe in saying that you attract more bees with honey than
you do with vinegar. Commanding an entity to do something seems
downright disrespectful to me. And treating said entity as a traitorous
being that should be feared, doesn’t in my books, show any sense of
respect. In fact, it seems that demons, in particular, are treated as
scapegoats, in which what is projected upon them is the very worst
traits of humanity, this done to avoid responsibility for those traits.
“The devil made me do it when I evoked him, officer”. That excuse
wouldn’t hold up in court, so why should it be acceptable in magical
practice?
When respect is missing from a partnership, there will always be a
tendency to either find a way out of that partnership or betray the
commanding person who set up the contract. Within my paradigm, respect
is essential. Instead of casting a binding circle to hold the demon and
compel it to appear and do as I command it, I summon the entity and we
have a chat. I tell it what I want, and I find out what it wants. I
don’t compel it to do anything. I treat it with respect. If we can form
an agreement, we each honor our side of that bargain. I apply this same
approach to deities. I treat them with respect, but also in a manner
that explains what I want and what I’m willing to do. Worship can be
part of what I offer, and if it is offered, it is offered in the full
context of worship, but with recognition as well that for worship to
occur there needs to be a mutual respect.
As you determine what you can offer, you also determine the boundaries,
in other words, the parameters of the relationship. Respect is one
boundary. Another boundary is exactly what the entity can offer and
exactly what you can offer. A personal example: Several years ago, a
friend of mine suggested I work with Aphrodite, because I was looking
for love in my life. I mulled it over, and decided to give it a try. I
evoked Aphrodite and explained that I wanted to manifest love in my
life and would like to get some advice from her. Her response was that
she could offer advice, but to do that she would like it if I made an
offering to her. She also explained that the offering could incorporate
her advice and manifest her energy in my life, if I desired. I thought
it over, and told her I could paint a painting to her. She agreed and
provided me the advice. Later that evening, mindful that I needed to
keep my end of the bargain, I started the painting. I also took to
including her in my list of entities I pray to each day. I didn’t need
to do the last action, but I figured it was worth the extra display of
respect.
Once you’ve determined the relationship, it then becomes a question of
fulfilling the actions necessary to maintain that relationship. If an
action isn’t fulfilled by one of the parties, then that relationship is
broken, and at that point consequences that aren’t desired come into
play. For instance, you work with a deity and that deity does something
to violate the boundaries of the relationship. At that point, a
consequence could be loss of worship, or a destruction of whatever was
done to indicate to said deity that you were upholding your end of the
relationship. Or if you didn’t uphold your end of the bargain, the
result might be an end of services provided, or worse a subtle twisting
of the services so that you end up in a situation you want to be in.
Remember that respect is earned at all times, and not just with other
people, but also with the entities you work.
My paradigm, as you can see, still has consequences. The difference is
that the relationship is created with an understanding that everyone
involved is equal, but has different gifts to bring to the table. The
differences are what actually creates the equality. I come to you
because I need something from you and in turn I offer you something you
need. It’s a win-win situation for everyone, as long as everyone
fulfills their part of the bargain. I’ll grant it’s a different
approach than just worshipping a god, or commanding a demon, but I’ve
found it works remarkably well. I’ve never had a bargain backfire, and
everyone has always left satisfied. Next time you decide to work with
an entity, chat it up and find out what it wants…then decide if it’s
worth it. You might be pleasantly surprised at just how much easier it
is to create a relationship where everyone wins.
Bibliography
Bardon, Franz. (2001). The practice of magical evocation: A complete
course of instruction in planetary spheric magic. Salt Lake City:
Merkur Publishing.
Kaldera, Raven (2006). Dark moon rising: Pagan BDSM and the ordeal
path. Hubbardston: Asphodel Press.
Lisiewski, Joseph (2004). Ceremonial magic and the power of evocation.
Tempe: New Falcon Press.
