August 18th, 2008.
12:20am - 3:00am Sun in 26 degrees Leo, Moon 11 degrees Leo , Ascendant 16 degrees Cancer.
There was more preliminary work I wanted to do on the history of the
boards and its uses, but it got me thinking of writing a small handbook
on the subject based off my own experiences, which I'm still compiling.
There is much more I would like to read and learn about this subject
before I am ready to do that. I hope you enjoy what there is for now,
until later!
On Hallowe'en, my birthday in 2007, I picked myself up a Ouija board
from the local "Toys R' Us". I used to play with one when I was 11 or
12. I often did so with a friend of mine by the name of Summerville
which later reminded me of the Wiccan Summerlands. Her mother had told
me that Megan had always been somewhat psychic and that she had no
stigmas about us experimenting in this way. In fact, like a friend of
mine has done for her children, she often left us alone to play with
the spirits. I remember I contacted a woman named Lorraine, who lived
in the late 1800's or early turn of the century or so I guessed by the
cut of her Western style pastel green sun dress and white gloves.
Meghan contacted someone who identified with the title "Bloody Mary",
which Lorraine was somehow tied into, and we empathized with them and
made friends. This was never to my detriment and in fact helped me with
a certain personal fear of mirrors. I also recall that at her twelfth
birthday party, my friend and I decided to employ a practice with
Tattwa cards as a fun activity instead of pin the tail on the donkey or
musical chairs, as most people that age might do. I still have no idea
how to came to understand what a Tattwa card was. I imagine we had read
about them in what I would call obscure books on "how to be psychic"
that we had most likely picked up from our school libraries. Needless
to say, between groups of teenage girls just coming of age, the attempt
at mind reading was a hit. If I remember correctly, it was also quite
successful.
I had bought my first Ouija Board nearly two years ago for whopping ten
Canadian dollars but due to a lack of willing participants, until this
particular night, I hadn't yet put it to use. Once or twice I measled
around with the board, not quite taking myself seriously enough and not
sure I wanted to. For some reason, I woke up one auspicious morning and
before drinking a coffee, getting dressed, or showering I jumped onto
the computer where a video was left open from the previous afternoon.
It was of a middle aged man who had been recording contact with the
ghosts residing around him and in his home for quite some time. He uses
a primitive ghost huntering "EVP" device in most of his videos,
recently updating his equipment, which much more clearly picks up the
voices he records. These voices are distinct and correspond with Jamie,
the incredibly well humored British man who uses the Ouija Board as a
medium. One of the spirits lending to the auditory apparitions is named
Martin, who died at age 15 in 1966 and visits with Jamie all the time,
even beginning to follow him to work! In fact, the others, like Jamie's
spirit guide "Prowling", who is Native American, seem to suggest that
Martin fancies Jamie. It's hard to tell if they're just teasing but
they literally imply that he's gay and it seems that they are teasing
him about it. It sounds almost like a crowded room, one voice carrying
above the others when it is directed at Jamie. One thing they all have
in common is that they often say, "We're here to protect you, Jamie."
After delving into this subject for an hour or two, deeply intrigued, I
can tell you that though I do tend to procrastinate with some things,
there was nothing stopping my being absolutely compelled to contact the
spirits directly that day; It was going to happen.
There was also another known instance in Toronto, Ontario in 1972
called "The Philip Experiment." The Toronto Society of Psychical
Research decided to do a certain kind of experiment on the subject.
They invented a character that had complete historical inaccuracy, a
fictitious name; all contrived events describing his death and life.
It's said that they had minimal success with the board itself, until
they began to hear raps on the walls and especially, on the bottom-side
of the table. The raps became more and more insistent. The table itself
seeming to respond at the suggestion that it might be Philip. They
learned about his likes and dislikes through the tapping table-top,
even what strong views he held on certain subjects by the frequency
thereof and they learned to treat "Philip" as a friend. It is said that
the table took on a life of its own, moving around the room, playing
tricks on them and literally jumping up and down and toward members
arriving late like an excited canine. It is also said that one member
jokingly mentioned something about how they could just send Philip away
at any moment, replacing him, whereafter the contact with the spirit
was said to have dwindled. The Society thought this a success as a
result of telekinesis, choosing to think that the collective mental
power of the group was responsible for the phenomena. Some would think
otherwise. As member Iris M. Owen states, "We clearly understand and
have proved that there is no 'spirit' behind the communications; the
messages are from the group subconscious, but it is the physical force
we need to know more about." It's really too bad when considering the
amount of research possibly lost, provided there may be a strong
connection between our own psyches and minds, and the spirit world
itself, though the terms spirit and world, singular, don't quite cut it
alone. I think of "kindred", for example or simply "otherworldly." From
my observations the ouija board can be used to contact many things on
several different planes.
The evening of the New Moon this August 18th, my favorite niece's
birthday, the ouija board was used for the first time with my friend
Jasmine and later for a second time with a man named Alex accompanying
us. Neither of them are expressly into the occult in any way and I
would like to point out that Alex is a recovering Mormon, recently
opening himself up to All Things. I secretly suspect that Jasmine was a
gypsy in at least one past life. "Jazz" and I went to a park where I
often feel high vibrations coming from when I practice my staff or glow
poi spinning there at night. This is directly behind my house, which is
incidentally adjacent to a graveyard. We set up just outside of the
light of a street lamp and sat on cement, lighting two candles we had
both carved earlier. Both of us had misspelled the word 'Ouija' on our
candles which we laughed at upon realizing, when we had each finished.
She wrote 'oija' and I had written 'ouiga'. "Oh well," I thought, "All
bases covered," and the words were seemingly our names and part of a
little chant for the night. It made me curious about the origins and
history of this sort of thing. My board had the word written across the
top (spelled correctly) with a pair of mysterious hooded feminine eyes,
a black background with red highlights on the white letters with the
occasional white shooting star. I decided to filter anything that may
have ill-wishes or harmful intentions through my Holy Guardian Angel
which since doing, thoughts have developed about this technique and its
usefulness. It was decided based partially on the video clips from
earlier in reference to a spirit guide that if my H.G.A. wouldn't talk
to whatever was talking to us, or if it wouldn't talk to her, it was
considered no good though the two concepts are now conceived to be
different. At the time this seemed to be very effective. I cast a
circle (both times), clearing the room with Sage and calling in the
Archangels, ridding the area of all negative influence I could
providing we were about to be inviting unseen forces in. I also asked
Jasmine to call on a protector, someone she trusted who had passed on
and she chose her grandfather. We tried to contact a little girl that I
had heard laughing while entertaining the dead with my practice poi at
a crossroad in the cemetery. We got her initials "ESB", the first
letter accurate to a grave stone that might have been hers but the last
name being beyond the scope of my poor memory. We also attempted
contact with Jasmine's grandfather but this prooved unsuccessful. We
didn't get much else while outside before it began to rain. What
connections were achieved did not seem very powerful. We were
troopers, hoping to sit it out though the showers persisted but
eventually when we ventured inside, we found another willing
contributor named Alex who joined us in continuing the experiement in
the room where I keep my altar.
One thing learned very quickly this night was to watch what one says
when using a Ouija Board, lest you confuse yourself. We pondered what
to do exactly, who to contact. And how much of the movement of the
black windowless planchette was our influence, per say? We played with
the cursor, moving it around a little of our own force to guage natural
resistance of the physical object while our fingers were placed on it.
After getting comfortable, we each decided that it was okay for any of
us to remove our fingers at any time, or to lighten up the pressure
being put onto the planchette, in order to satisfy our disbelief, if we
felt either we were pulling it along ourselves or to observe that
others were not doing the same. This was incredibly effective, as the
connections we received indoors were noticeably stronger. It was
interesting and surprising to see someone's fingers come completely off
of the board, when for example, I thought Alex might be pressing too
hard or was guiding the cursor himself despite the often shocked look
on his white face in turn causing the same on my own. We were all more
than taken aback at how incredibly strong the presences we felt here
were, Alex especially so. I had asked Alex to call on a protector of
his own although he knew no one who had passed on and I was at fault
for not suggesting his well-wishing ancestors as a whole. We were at
first wavering between asking "Is there anybody there, any one at all?"
and then to my Angel, "Are you there?" At one point we had began
talking to my Angel although I interrupted the initial conversation
repeating, "Is there any one there?" period, still getting used to
making contact at all and feeling out wherever I could. Whatever we
contacted by my asking the latter, was not my Angel. We had decided to
ask for any messages that my own H.G.A. had to give either of my guests
but when asked for a message for Alex, who was undoubtedly questioning
the gender of his unborn child, whatever we were communicating with
spelled out, "S-H-A-K-A-U-Q" "L-A-R-P-V-A" and "R-O-S-P-S." None of
this made any sense to us. We asked whatever it was to speak in English
to no avail which seems to happen often in personal experience. I
recognized my mistake in no time and I asked my Angel if She was still
there. She answered "Yes," but not to it being her that had been
speaking to us incoherently. I then tested the spirit to see if it
would communicate with Her and it would not, nor she to it, so we did
away with that and said goodbye promptly. Next we made sure to ask my
H.G.A. specifically if She had any messages for Jasmine, and She said,
"R-I-B," "L-A-L-A-W-4-U," which we were also unable to interpret. I
would interpret this in basic numerologically but as Jasmine has no
interest in this, I will most likely leave the meaning unknown. I
asked if "L-A-L-A" without the "W" had anything to do with the singing
Jasmine does but apparently it did not. We were confused and getting a
little aggravated at the lack of proper english, wanting to hear
something we could understand. As it was my turn to ask for a message,
being very comfortable in this area several ideas came to mind. They
sat patiently for a moment while I thought about who exactly to get in
touch with.
I would ask about someone for whom I have many questions, about whom
deep feelings of comradory are felt, also who's existence holds
unexplained synchronicities personally, not yet figured out. I am
reading one of her books right now; Her name is Sybil Leek and she was
one of the last century's most famous English witches. She used to go
on long walks with H.G. Wells discussing the metaphysical. Apparently
Aleister Crowley, the one to encourage her to begin writing her own
works, used to sit her on his lap and read her poetry when she first
met him at the age of 9, a very important number for me. Mr. Crowley
was said to have relied heavily on either her Mother or her Grandmother
for Astrological advice. Sybil Leek was born on February 22nd, 1917,
the year my grandfather was born, being throughout her life an
Astrology scholar and author, a subject I have been deeply enamored
with since the age of sixteen. She disguised her birth year saying it
was 1922 most likely to prevent her chart being cast by strangers. Her
obituary brought her real year of birth to the public eye. This places
her actual birth date as 2/22/1922, my luckiest of numbers being 2 and
any permutations thereof, especially 222. She was married at sixteen,
my second most favorite number since I was old enough to remember, the
year Astrology came into my life as mentioned and to a music teacher, a
subject I am most naturally inclined to since age eleven and minimally
even before that. Her first husband unfortunately passed only two years
later. She had very strongly held beliefs about certain ritual
practices and ethics in Magick, such as an intolerance toward nudity,
which I have also felt deeply affected by, holding the same base
opinions though always with a right to basic personal freedom in mind.
So I asked my Angel if I may speak with Sybil Leek and pulling very
swiftly, the board answered with a very affirmative "Yes." We all
noticed an extreme change in the air, as it was oddly still now with
electricity zapping through it and us. The hair on all of our arms and
some on our heads stood up and my right arm began to spasm a little so
much that switching hands was necessary, though it continued convulsing
in short waves even out of use. I was rather amused at this and
astonished! "Hello Sybil," I said with the delight of a schoolgirl.
"So... Do you have any messages for me?" She answered, "Yes,"
immediately spelling out, "VOW."
"A Vow?" I asked, and she answered yes again. "A vow to do what?"
I wondered, and the board wrote, "M-A-R-K" "Mark," we all said out
loud, as I fumbled for my pen and paper with my quivering right hand,
each of us looking at one and other, we then caught, "A-I-K-O-T," as if
she were attempting to spell in syllables what she meant, for which we
asked for a clarification of. She then spelled out, "E - T" "Market?
Like a market with fruit?" I asked, stupidly, "No," Sybil said,
"Marketing, as in marketing something?" and she replied positively.
"Market what?" and she wrote so simply, I am amazed that I was amazed
at all, "Y-O-U-R-S-E-L-F." I almost cried out of gratitude and
bewilderment. I then started off firing questions at her about certain
incarnations and how they were related, for example, the girl who
initiated me into Magick seemed to think that she was the reincarnation
of Sybil Leek herself, which I always questioned, as her Work, provided
she was conscious of this, was not very extensive. So, I asked if this
was true and she answered, "No." When I asked her is she had known this
girl at all, or what their relationship was, she only answered, "Y."
She was right to ask, "Why?" as I had no business knowing this, or at
least not a real reason to ask. So, I moved on asking her about our
numerous connections, and as you might ask an older sister, I gushed
with such a nostalgic feeling as I usually have when reading her
novels. It had crossed my mind that I may be a reincarnation of hers,
as though my work is also not incredibly extensive, Sybil had a very
late start, not beginning to publish books until she was in her
mid-forties. I thought it was possible though she answered no. When I
asked what, in fact, had our relationship been, my hair raised again as
she wrote, "L-O-V-E-" and I paused thinking this was nice, before even
realizing she had landed on the letter "R." She was a double Pisces,
both of her luminaries, a Scorpio Rising... With my inevitable
attraction to Pisces being the strongest I've almost ever known, and my
own affiliation to the lust, the sex and Sign of Scorpio,
Astrologically, how could I not have seen this? I laughed a long hard
laugh out loud and was glad I had decided to do this, putting all of
the fear I had ever known for this board completely aside when we had
began talking. Suddenly the feelings I felt when I looked up anything
on Sybil, when I would sit up near 5 and 6 am reading short biographies
of her life, or reading her commentaries available on the internet
about Wicca or Astrology itself and what kept me clinging to it made
much more sense. Understanding that there were really only so many
questions left to ask and outside of companionship which we had already
been gained, I was nearly satisfied. For a final question, I asked
about the Tarot readings I do around the city and speaking of marketing
myself, I mentioned that I'd been having trouble coming up with a name
for the venture. She replied with this: "NYX VAIN OVA U." I knew "NYX"
was a Goddess but I did not from where or of what, though it had a
Lillithian undertone in my mind. I felt a deep sense of flattery, "So,
Nyx is vain over me?" I said grinning and blushing at the same time, to
which she answered yes. "Should I name my business something to do with
Nyx?" a very strong yes, and then, "A-VOW,"I should make a vow to Nyx?"
"Yes," and while I sat there stunned, just as quickly as she came, she
said goodbye.
A short study has told me that Nyx is the daughter of Chaos, primordial
Goddess of the Night, from ancient Greece, wife to Tartarus or Hades,
also known as Erebus, God of the all-covering darkness and shadow; they
are also brother and sister. I was under the impression that Nyx was
the Mother of Zeus, which in fact she is not, that would be Rhea. Some
of Nyx's children include personifications of atmosphere, day, and
"asexually" she gave birth to blame, toil, fate, death, sleep, the
ferryman of hades, dreams, retribution, deception, friendship, age and
strife, new life, a world-egg deity named Phanes, by the blood of
Uranus' castration, she birthed the goddess of craziness, rabies or
madness. "The Greeks variously claimed that the Fates were the
daughters of Zeus and the Titaness Themis or of primordial beings like
Nyx, Chaos or Anake."(1) She is born of Chaos. She jives well with my
Scorpionic inclinations. I also recognize "The God Of Sleep" as having
a firm hold on me. How I will proceed from here, one may speculate but
for now, as for an exact answer, I will have to keep you in the dark.
